Self-Victimization is a Predator
Sometimes we have sparrows singing in our chests. Sometimes we have the cold raw sound of crows stealing the serenity of a new day.
Sometimes we cherish ourselves and find the strength to carry on, in spite of the hollowness that seems so prevalent in these ends of days. We pull together and find the cracks where the light gets in. Sometimes that pull requires all our strength.
If we can’t see that, we crumble.
We tend to forget ourselves, don’t honor ourselves, eyes can’t catch the beauty anymore and we move into a darker space. We curse the Matrix, we curse our past, we perceive everything mundane as a pile of shit, we go very dark.
It often happens when we forget to receive.
We have to receive. There has to be a balance. No soul in this world is an island, but if you feel that way – rejoice in the fact that islands are connected through water.
It depends on where we’re coming from. We may have a history of being betrayed, getting tricked, getting left behind. Maybe it was done to us, maybe we did it. But it’s history and we can’t let that define our further choices and let hurt or self-perceived hurt define us.. It’s a loveless dead-end street and we cannot make our journey in such a place.
Self-victimization is an Apex Predator roaming your bloodstream, your mind, preying on every positive molecule that emerges from the inside, tries to reach you from the outside and it got nested in your heart.
Always targeting somebody or something to blame to cope with the inner loveless pain of wanting the same love that gets repelled by our own loveless actions.
The metaphysical answer to forgiveness, is actually not to forgive as the first step. The first step is not blaming anybody.
It´s a Sutra: If you need to forgive love – stop blaming it!
I wrote some time ago: Love is never a sacrifice – Love can only sacrifice within itself. Pull the courage to sacrifice what you once loved and allow yourself to move on. No mundane love is never in vain – it had a purpose, it told a tale either to live by or detach from.
A lot of us are a bit weird.
We know there’s a matrix, we know a lot folks don’t know. And I’m not being elitist here – I really just think I’m stating the obvious: there still aren’t that many out there we can resonate with in understanding where we collectively are in time and space right now.
It limits the options, doesn’t it?
And then we set out to find other ways to find love….
We know there’s a lot of love out there still behind the masks. The collective love vibe is picking up tremendous speed and the frequency is high. That’s really something. That’s really revolutionary. That is the clue in which we’re connected, It’s the water between the Isles. From muddy boots to shiny shoes.
We need that fuel since we’re still student to this world. Sometimes our hearts sings: “And I can’t stay alone tonight”, when it does, when it calls it seems like that high altitude metaphysical love doesn’t cut it anymore.
We need: In the Flesh.
We need it to manifest in the physical. We need the touch. We need eyes to disappear in. We need warm healing fingers up our spine. We need to hear a breathing beside us.
We need the boost in that. We need the charging in that. Or we will crumble and we can’t afford to crumble.
‘Yes, but I am so lonely I could die’ Loneliness is deadly, even science thinks so.
And the difference between feeling alone and being lonely gets very clear.
Best solution is: Step out of the corner you have backed yourself into. Take the risk, be a warrior.
Somebody out there will say to you: ‘Yes, I will love you, I will find solace in your eyes, I will find life in your breath, I will transcend in your sweet touch’.
But, maybe its you that needs to reach out, dare it and say: *I think I can love you’ – to somebody you fancy, even from a distance.
You might get a ‘Yes’ – You might get a ‘No’.
Never take a ‘No’ personal – that is self victimization speaking.
Be proud and keep the boat afloat.
Be that brave.
‘I will surrender’ and that is the scariest, bravest thing we can do and the most rewarding. Leaving hurt behind and leaving it outside the doorway to a life in love.
Begone, petty little differences – keep your eye on the big picture and listen to somebody who whispers:
‘Yes, I can love you because I have no choice when in your presence’.
In such a wicked time where social distancing is the Mantra: Move closer.
Love really is the only thing that can take this down.
© 2021 Soren Dreier