Why Your Healing Journey Might Feel Stuck (and How to Gently Shift It)

If you’ve been doing a lot of inner work, or if you’ve just recently started your healing journey, but nothing in your outer world seems to be shifting, this post is for you.

It can feel frustrating when you’ve been turning inward, working with your emotions, trying to be more aware and conscious, and yet your relationships, work, or external circumstances still feel out of sync with that inner progress. I see this a lot, and I want to share three gentle, grounded reasons why this might be happening.

I’m Antonya, and I love talking about emotional healing, deep self-awareness, and the powerful shifts that come when we reconnect with the truth of who we are. I also work with Soul Contracts, which I believe are such an important key to understanding ourselves more fully. Because the more self-aware we become, the easier it is to navigate life with steadiness and flow, like becoming the captain of your own ship, rather than being tossed around by the waves.

So let’s explore the three common things that might be keeping you stuck (and how you can start to gently move forward again).

No. 1 Joking About Your Pain as a Way to Avoid Feeling It

This first one can be subtle, and often we don’t even realise we’re doing it.

Sometimes we tell a story about something painful that happened, but we deliver it with a laugh. We might say things like, “It’s kind of funny how unconfident I am!” or “This ridiculous thing happened to me…” And while it might sound light-hearted, this can actually be a way of invalidating ourselves.

Now, I’m not saying we can’t ever use humour. Laughter absolutely has a place in healing, as it can be deeply relieving and freeing. But when we use humour to gloss over our wounds, especially with people who may not fully understand us or what we’ve been through, it can be a way of avoiding the depth of what needs to be felt.

Healing is about feeling. Not in a way that requires us to wallow or get stuck, but in a way that gently allows the truth of our pain to be acknowledged and heard. When we skip that part, even unintentionally, we miss an important step in our healing.

So if you catch yourself joking about something that still carries a sting, it might be worth pausing and asking: Have I really felt this? Or am I cushioning it with humour because it feels too vulnerable to touch?

No 2. Getting Stuck in the Head Instead of the Body

The second thing I see all the time (and yes, I do this too) is intellectualising our emotions.

This can look like analysing what happened, trying to trace things back to a cause, or figuring it all out logically: “Oh, I probably have low self-worth because of that one thing my dad did…” We understand it, but we haven’t felt it. We haven’t acknowledged where that wound lives in the body, or allowed ourselves to release what’s been held there.

This is the ego’s way of keeping us safe. The ego doesn’t want to lose control, and emotional work can feel like a loss of control. Our body knows things our mind can’t process, and it stores unprocessed emotion in ways we don’t always expect. So staying up in the mind, trying to "figure it out", can become a very sneaky form of avoidance.

One of the simplest ways to reconnect with the body is just to pause. Lean back. Lie down. Close your eyes and scan gently through your body. Ask yourself: Where do I feel this? What wants to be felt right now?

Recently, during an intense training, a fear of dying came up in my divine healing chart. I brushed it off at first as“sure, everyone’s scared of dying.” But when I actually paused and let myself feel it, my chest hurt. I cried deeply for about half an hour, grief and pain pouring through. That moment of stillness allowed something long-held to finally move.

So if you find yourself over-analysing or spiralling in thoughts, come back to the body. The healing lives there.

No 3. Invalidating Yourself Through Comparison

The third thing to look out for is subtle (or not-so-subtle) comparison. This sounds like: “Well, what happened to me wasn’t that bad…” or “Other people have it worse, so it doesn’t really count.”

But here’s the truth: it does count. Your pain is valid, even if it seems small. Sometimes, it’s the tiniest wounds that cut the deepest, a throwaway comment from years ago, a moment of being ignored or misunderstood. These seemingly small things can pierce our softest core and leave lasting imprints.

And your healing journey is completely unique. No one else has lived your life, your experiences, your past lives, your ancestral patterns. You are a one-of-a-kind blueprint. So please don’t minimise what you’ve been through just because it doesn’t look like someone else’s story.

Even if you’ve had what looks like a relatively “easy” life in this lifetime, there are other layers, other dimensions, ancestral imprints, karmic ties. It all adds up to your own unique experience of being human.

So instead of comparing, offer yourself compassion. Let your inner world be seen and acknowledged by you first. That self-validation is one of the deepest gifts you can give yourself.

A Gentle Invitation To Go Inwards

If you’re feeling stuck on your healing journey, I invite you to pause and reflect on these three areas:

• Are you lightening your pain with humour instead of allowing it to be felt?

• Are you staying in your head instead of dropping into the body?

• Are you invalidating your experiences because they seem small or “not as bad”?

These aren’t things to judge or criticise yourself for, they’re really normal. But simply noticing them can be the beginning of a gentle shift. Healing is not a race. It’s a tender, spiralling path. And you are exactly where you need to be.

I hope this reflection offers some comfort and clarity. I love sharing about emotional healing, Soul contracts, and the deeper truths that guide our journey. If this resonates, you’re always welcome to subscribe to my channel for further insights or sign up to my newsletter to stay in touch.

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Carry on exploring