10 Gentle Ways to Support Yourself When You Feel Low

We all have those moments when we just don’t feel good about ourselves or our lives.

Sometimes it’s just a moment in passing, and sometimes it can last for days, or longer. I also get those down days, when I feel so defeated by life, so overwhelmed, so tired, that I just don’t know what to do to feel better. Which is exactly why I wanted to share the ten best things to remind yourself of when you’re not feeling so peachy.

But, before we dive in, I wanted to share a few reasons that might be causing the blues, and what you can start to do about it.

Why comparison makes us feel low

The first thing I would ask is this - are you being too hard on yourself? One of the biggest reasons why we get down on ourselves is because we mentally beat ourselves up for not being better, doing better, or being further along than we are.

This all stems from looking around us and comparing our lives with others, thinking that we should be more like them, and less like ourselves. And, in the age of social media, where the highlights, successes and achievements of everyone around us are on full show, I really get it, it’s hard not to compare.

Even for me, just 10 minutes ago I was scrolling through Instagram seeing people sharing their business success, their talents in creating amazing content, hearing stories of how they travelled the world, and just felt ‘less than’, that’s the only way I can describe it.

And after that, I felt my mood just drop.

I don’t think we’re fundamentally wired to have this constant internal exposure to people we don’t even know. And for those of us who are working hard to develop a strong and healing sense of self-worth, this kind of thing is so detrimental for our inner self-belief.

When we don’t feel like we’re ‘enough’ we can feel really down about ourselves and our lives. Yet, just stepping out of comparison and refocusing on our own lives, and the massive potential still sitting silently within us all, is a way to start pulling ourselves back to our present moment and back into the fullness of our lives.

When unspoken feelings weigh us down

Another reason why we can feel so down is due to feelings under the surface that just haven’t had the chance to be felt or expressed.

This always used to happen to me - I used to have this pattern where I’d be feeling great one moment and the next it was like I’d fallen down a black hole, and I just didn’t know why or how to get myself out.

After a little time and healing, I realised that I wasn’t properly feeling all of my emotions. Instead, I was just sailing over them, not giving them the space they deserved to be felt and released.

And I totally get why. Sometimes, for the sensitive souls amongst us, we feel things too deeply, and so it feels safer and easier to sometimes just turn off the emotional tap in order to get through life without being so deeply affected.

When we numb our emotions, or aren’t fully conscious of how we’re feeling about ourselves, then those emotions tend to just sit under the surface, popping up and surprising us when we least expect them to. If we’re feeling down, then there is a crystal clear reason behind it, we just need to be brave and get to the core of what it is.

So there’s a few things for you to think about.

Feeling down is a completely normal part of being human, but the key is to understand what you think it might be truly about, and then taking a little action to counteract it. We’re allowed to feel low, but we don’t want to hang out in this energy for too long, as this is what can be so draining and end up leaving us feeling disempowered and lost in life, when really, we’re always fully in command of ourselves.

1. This too shall pass

I love this famous saying too much not to share because the wisdom it holds is just so real and true. Nothing is permanent in this life, including the stress, overwhelm, grief or sadness we may be feeling. Everything is temporary, including whatever circumstances we may be dealing with that are causing us to feel low.

Just know that the sun will shine again, new people will come into your life, things will always change, you will also change, and that is exactly how it is meant to be. Another affirmation you could say that really compliments this is “even though life feels hard right now, I know that it will pass, and I trust I am feeling better in no time at all”.

2. Gaining back perspective

When life feels hard we tend to zone in on all the struggles and challenges, instead of seeing the bigger picture. Life is always about perspective, because without it we just can’t see the whole truth. When we’re feeling down, we need to zone back out again and put our lives in perspective.

If we’re struggling in one area of our life, what other area is going well? If we’re feeling disheartened or lacking confidence, is there something we know we’re good at? If we’re feeling a little lost in life and it’s bringing us down, is there something that we know gives us joy that we can bring our focus back to?

3. Breathe deeply

When we feel low it’s all too easy to wallow in our thoughts, whatever they may be. For me I tend to become despondent, overwhelmed and confused, to the point where I just don’t know what to do with myself. This is when the mind can become really overactive, so we tend to do whatever we can to numb it out.

Instead, we can choose to become more present with what’s really going on under the surface. Just sitting and breathing deeply, with no distractions, can be a powerful way to allow the emotions to come to the surface, so we can understand why we’re feeling this way, and it’s amazing how good it feels when they come into the open.

4. Take a walk

I will say this to my dying day, but taking a walk outside in the fresh air has to be one of the best things we can do for ourselves whenever we’re feeling down, stressed, overwhelmed or anything in between. When we feel low it’s really easy to cocoon ourselves in the safety of our home, where we don’t have to face the outside world. But, sometimes the energy of our home can really compound the feelings that are swirling under the surface, making us actually feel worse.

My advice is to take a walk outside. Not only to get your body moving, feel the wind and sun on your face, but also to create some space for your emotions to unravel and unwind.

5. Phone a friend

None of us like being a burden, and I know this because of how many times people have said it to me when they’ve been dealing with their problems alone. Sometimes it feels better to just deal with our stuff privately, but other times we really need the love and non-judgemental support of someone we trust, whether it’s our friends or family.

We are not weak for needing support, and we are certainly not a burden - that’s what family and friends are for. When we reach out in our low moments and allow ourselves to be held (something that all of us need) it’s amazing how much lightness that support gives us. And it reminds us that we’re not alone, even when we feel like it.

6. It’s a rollercoaster of life

I don’t think our lives on earth are easy, for anyone, no matter how rich they are, how happy they seem, or how madly in love they appear. The human experience is a wild one for sure, but sometimes we forget just how wild it is. It’s not meant to be all sunshine and rainbows, so when we’re having a bad day, it’s important to be compassionate with ourselves.

We need to remember that we’re just doing our best, and that is enough. We’re not superhuman and we’re not immune to the craziness of this life, so give yourself a break and take the pressure off - you’re doing remarkably well.

7. Taking care of yourself

When we’re feeling low it’s all too easy to let things slide. So, as well as taking care of ourselves emotionally, we also need to take care of ourselves physically. More often than not, feeling low is a physical response to not getting enough sleep, not eating a balanced diet with plenty of fresh fruit and vegetables, perhaps being a little dehydrated, overloading ourselves with phone time, and not taking any time to move our bodies and get outside in nature.

If we take just a few days to reset, through eating well, sleeping early and disconnecting a little from our screens, it can do us the world of good and bring us back into a much more balanced and stable state of being.

8. You are not your thoughts

When we’re feeling low it’s really easy to believe that every thought we have is true - it isn’t. Our mind is processing up to 60,000 thoughts a day, most of them repetitive and many of them negative. Our mind is just a processing machine, helping us to create logical decisions to stay safe as we move through life.

Your thoughts are just a never-ending reel of ‘what if’ scenarios of the future, and regrets of actions from the past that cannot be changed. So, when the mind is churning out thoughts at 100 miles per hour, just remember that it’s processing for you, but it’s not you. Whatever the mind tells us, isn’t always real and isn’t always true.

9. Light at the end of the tunnel

There’s always a light at the end of the tunnel, even when it feels as if we’re struggling through pitch blackness. This is something I always like to remember when times feel a little tough; nothing is permanent, and there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. What this means is that there is always an ending, and a new start, to the different chapters in our lives.

You may be in a chapter now that feels hard, but it will always end - this is the light. And, when things are feeling tough, it’s often a sign that you’re in the middle of something and that the end is closer than you think, you just need to hang in there.

10. Come back to joy

When we’re feeling low we deserve to be cocooned in comfort. We don’t need to punish or restrict ourselves from what gives us joy, we need to move towards our pleasure. Like eating chicken soup when we’re sick, we need to also nourish our soul when it’s feeling down. This means doing the things that give you joy, such as reading your favorite book, watching your most-loved TV show, cooking your favorite food or anything else.

I never used to be able to do this because I was too stuck in the overwhelm and stress of feeling low, but now I’ve realised that having a really hot bath, putting on my comfiest clothes and watching a show, knowing that tomorrow is a new day, is the perfect way to support myself.

If you’d like support and guidance on your spiritual and emotional healing journey, you may like to book a Soul Contract Reading, book a Divine Healing session, or sign up to my newsletter to stay in touch for more similar posts.

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Carry on exploring